Of Mice and Men
One of the number one topics discussed amongst single woman today is none other than the opposite sex. This day and age, dating has become one of the touchiest subjects. The right and wrong rules of dating, where and how to meet a man/woman, all of it tends to be a huge blur depending on the different opinions you hear. Personally I am not one to brag about my experiences but, I believe my opinions can save some poor hopefuls from steering in the wrong direction.
Being located in Manhattan, one of the worlds most populated cities, definitely shakes things up a bit. One thing I've witnessed is the wide array of people you see by simply walking down the street. Here's a scenario for you:
Walking down the street you see the most handsome well-dressed man walking down the opposite direction towards you. As your heels are clicking and you take a closer step towards him you both lock eyes for a few seconds. Those seconds can have you thinking "Man, will I ever see someone like this again."
And that answer is yes people. Variety is the number one reason behind a lot. For this particular scenario, yourself and this guy probably both say to themselves that they will probably see someone just as better looking in the very near future, and probably in a more convenient time. Unfortunately what men see on the outside serves as your original first impression. Personally I believe the way someone dresses and carries themselves proves a lot. When stepping out in public I always make sure I leave looking most presentable. Of course that depends on your surroundings and where you are going. Now looking your best to me does not mean to have on your best outfits and your highest heel. I'm talking about having the decency to make sure your hair is not the "I woke up like dis" style. I am a firm believer when they say you'll never know who you're going to meet and where. For every guy I've ever had a relationship as close as "dating", I have met them at the most random times. But I think to myself, what if it was one of those crazy bad hair days? What if I was careless and ditched the heels that one time I was out. Call it cliche but when I step out I always make sure I look like the best version of myself. Guys look to the minimal things you should be keeping up with yourself. Is your hair decent, are your nails and feet done? Also if you have reverted to the leggings as pants on the first date, I'm sorry but theirs little hope for you.
Getting to know a guy 101. Again this proves to be difficult today when most of our social lives are already revealed online; or a selection of things we want others to see. And with the convenient communication known as texting it is super easy to get mislead or otherwise lose complete interest, which I have grown witness to many times. Call me old school but I prefer to get to know the person I'm seeing verbally or face to face. What's better in your mind, a texted "lol" to a joke you just gave, or seeing them in person on a casual date and seeing the person actually laugh, or not but I like to think I'm funny (insert lol here). Put it this way ladies, and gents, if the person you are communicating with isn't finding time or committing to meeting then you should send that one to the discarded list. Now, I definitely respect someone who puts up a good effort. I myself can somehow seem like I can never make time or am too busy, but I've learned that no one is ever too busy (Unless you are the president himself and even he gets a lunch break I assume).
Revealing too much too soon.
Ok so your finally went on a first date with this very good looking guy you have been waiting to see for weeks. Like most dates wine or any kind of alcohol is the perfect third wheel to join in. Of course the liquid courage takes off the edge and can relax the nerves a little bit. But what happens when you get a little bit too comfortable? Of course you want the conversation to continue and get even better but, there is such thing as telling too much. Topics of conversation can be kept to hobbies, fun facts and things you two may have in common. Things that are completely off limits to me include past relationships, work and an hour long biography on your life. You two are just getting to know each other. I doubt that what your ex did to you will win you a 10 on this date, save that for date number 3 (if you make it to that). Work can also be a touchy subject to talk about. Of course we would like to know how you make your money but all the details of salary is irrelevant (trust me I've heard it all). Lastly no one likes someone that's talks about themselves the WHOLE time. This also makes you look a bit arrogant and self centered. If you are on a date and have not asked the person a single thing about themselves and you've been the one to answer all the questions, it may be time to switch things up.
Of course all our opinions are different but they all can serve as useful. Most of us feel the way we do from recent events such as myself. The only thing you can do to protect your heart is to make sure you do everything that will make you happy in the end. Never adjust your life for someone who wouldn't think twice of doing it for you. Your time is the most valuable thing you have that you can't ever get back, make sure you use it wisely.
Until next time
Samantha in the City